29 Jul 2008

Kook alert: Rhaetic is now a Semitic language?

Here's something to add to the "crazy folder". The 2007 article in this pdf that I came across yesterday is entitled Rhaetic: An extinct Semitic language in Central Europe by Professors Dr. Alfréd Tóth and Dr. Linus Brunner. The claim should look suspicious to even moderately educated readers from the start but even if one is temporarily lured by these doctorate-bedecked authors, the ludicrous translations that these highly imaginative but weakly methodical sorts typically produce betrays the rather lengthy historical preface they go through all in order to add credibility to the hopeless translations that follow:

reit[i] emuiu thinake
"My Ritu, I have given firewood." (page 74)

la [e]ste phutikhinu
"Estu, don't kill us!" (page 77)

la sbaphi rimaki nageki khašikhanu epetav
“Don’t dry out my bath; we need your help; I give berries (fruits?).” (pages 79 & 80)
Must I go on? It's good for a laugh. Thankfully even these documents serve a purpose as a kind of "intellectual shibboleth" since scholars who cite these nonsensical works for anything other than an example of undiagnosed psychological disorder are likewise probably not dealing with a full deck of cards. Life is short. Let's not make it shorter with craziness, okay people?

7 comments:

  1. Oh wow, who needs comedy central if you have nutjobs like this?

    They're actually translating sentences into Semitic, which is fairly impressive, if these sentence semantically made any sense at all. But they don't how can you claim that these are correct sentences!

    It's like claiming that the word 'Anusvaara' is clearly Finnish, because in Finnish it means 'anus dagger', rather than it being Sanskrit where it means 'nose sound'.

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  2. Phoenix: "It's like claiming that the word 'Anusvaara' is clearly Finnish, because in Finnish it means 'anus dagger', rather than it being Sanskrit where it means 'nose sound'."

    Exactly (and thanks for that risqué example, hahaha). This sort of "dictionary eyeballing" is too easy, especially when context is ignored. In fact, they can't even stick to Semitic because they claim that the 1ps pronoun is an Indo-European borrowing. None of these findings are accepted by the mainstream, of course.

    I'm never sure whether I'm coming across correctly on this blog but my point is that when comparing languages, it has to be systematic and translations have to fit in all instances where they are found. When I mean "fit", I mean that *all* translations should be in line with the object at hand and the known historical usages of these objects. Being stricter with oneself yields better results rather than making up numerous side-hypotheses as to why a translation is apparently nonsensical. When most of the pipes in your house are leaking, it might be time to get a new house.

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  3. Just out of interest, would you postulate a link between Etruscan and Rhaetic? From what I've read (and not knowing much about these languages), there is a relation, so I've heard. I would guess that these 'nutjobs' (thanks Phoenix, I've not come across that word for a while! Love it!) would have some odd theory on the relationship between Rhaetic and Etruscan....

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  4. Hang on, further to my previous comment, I've just found a bit of the article that refutes an Etruscan link:

    "We must therefore conclude that there were no Etruscans in the Alps and that thus the Raeti – whose presence in the Alps are testified by dozens of mentionings in the works of the Roman and Greek writers – are - in opposition to the autochthonous “Euganeans” – late emigrants, coming from Mesopotamia, speaking a language that is related next to Eastern Semitic Akkadian." (p.22)

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  5. Damon Lord: "Just out of interest, would you postulate a link between Etruscan and Rhaetic?"

    Yes, I think this is the most reasonable hypothesis. Unfortunately, there are few inscriptions to rely on so far. So I look at this hypothesis as an idea worthy of future investment even if it's probably not provable yet by the strict standards of mainstream academia.

    Damon Lord: "I would guess that these 'nutjobs' [...] would have some odd theory on the relationship between Rhaetic and Etruscan...."

    You must be specific. It's far too easy to play a logic game of "I know you are but what am I" whereby anything someone says is reciprocated back to them with generalities and no facts. Sometimes people don't even know they're playing that game. I've seen this pattern online and wish to avert it.

    So while 'nutjobs' are present in every camp of thought, however we may personally define the term 'nutjob', it's pointless to ponder on generalities like these. Which scholar espousing the belief in a relationship to Etruscan are you referring to exactly? What about this theory do you find implausible? Etc, etc.

    At least in the case of these two 'doctors' and their pdf, we can positively say that their miserable attempt at translation is so incompetent as to be taken as an indication of some sort of mental impairment, yes. Let's dare to be honest with ourselves.

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  6. "Anus danger" actually. I wouldn't be surprized if someone had even tried to defend that connection in the past, I've seen propositions from the 19th century about Greek, Latin etc. being derived from Finnish on the basis of "correspondences" such as agrīs being approximately sirkka "cricket" reversed. (Seriously.) At least these days the way languages can possibly be related is understood well enuff that any Basque monk theories will get their just ridicule.

    ---

    Note to self: if you ever participate on a time capsule, include artifacts with "My ___, I have given firewood" engraved. :D

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  7. Tropylium: "'Anus danger' actually. I wouldn't be surprized if someone had even tried to defend that connection in the past,[...]"

    I'm sure you're on to something there. It's important to note however that the degree of "anus danger" is dependent on socio-cultural factors. Afterall, in some cultures, the anus poses no more threat than a loving housepet. Lol! (Okay, clearly I've gone off the deep end now.)

    Tropylium: "At least these days the way languages can possibly be related is understood well enuff that any Basque monk theories will get their just ridicule."

    One would certainly like to think that our species is collectively more enlightened now than ever before but fantasy is a powerful drug, the hidden addiction.

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